7 Cheats to having a Perfect Day 

  1. Wake up on the right side of your bed. Apparently there is a wrong side, so the other one must be the right side.
  2. Better yet, don’t wake up. Sleep in all day. It’s fool proof. Not a thing can go wrong when you’re asleep.
  3. If you have been forced to wake up, start off with some yum grub. Food is the next best thing after sleep.
  4. Go on a long walk. Maybe even run. Running from your problems is a really effective way to stay happy. I’d know! I’ve been doing it for 19 years.
  5. Take a nice long shower while contemplating cruel ways to punish those who dare to annoy you.
  6. When you’re choosing what to wear, make sure your clothes are of idiot repellent fabric. If there are chances of a shower of stupidity in the daily forecast, you don’t want to get any on you.
  7. Before you leave the house make sure you grab some tolerance and ignorance. It has to be of the right balance other wise it won’t work. Then wrap it up with a sense of humour so that it lasts all day!

– The Obsessive Writer.

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